Night on Bald Mountain

Being a private person is a tricky thing.

On one hand, independence is lauded, prized. The inherent fascination of secrecy means that if you have so much as a twinkle in your eye of information separate to and from the context of the present group, you've really got something going for you. You've got a rich inner life, and plenty of activities, and you're sought-after; you know your own worth quite well.

On the other, nobody likes a liar, a trickster, an individual less than completely forthright about where they've been and where they're going to, like it matters. Honesty is even more important than secrecy, because honesty by its very nature cannot stab you in the back, and sometimes it can reveal some damned interesting truths, to boot.

Addam knows that Minoth casts himself a private person, above all. Everybody knows it. It's evident in every aspect of his presentation, and then he opens his mouth and even more mystery tumbles out into the midground. Wordplay, cryptic and wistful allusions, compliments slung easily but clearly well-founded.

Minoth both 1) has history and 2) doesn't always tell it. He gives just enough hints to keep himself on everyone's good side (and them coming back for more). He would be an artisan even if he didn't know it.

But enough preamble. The basic thrust: Addam accepts that Minoth will always have something else up his sleeve that he doesn't feel comfortable sharing. Addam accepts that this is not because Minoth doesn't trust him, necessarily - not completely, anyway. Addam accepts that the situation is delicate and at times tenuous.

Minoth accepts that Addam is a very accepting person. Minoth accepts that Addam considers himself an open book not very much worth reading, except for a laugh, sometimes. Minoth accepts that what he doesn't know about Addam's childhood amounts to nothing when one considers the substance of the actual events, and that, by comparison, he holds an undue advantage, or share of cards. But still, Minoth waits.

(Oh, and don't even mention "gold for your thoughts" - it was funny once, but never again.)

Someday, naturally, they'll reach a true level understanding. Addam will know everything about Minoth, and Minoth will know everything about Addam. Gone will be the assumptions, about who's hurt and who cares, of whose attention is begged and whose is given.

In fact, before any of that, each realizes that he has to allow himself the vulnerability of simply saying to the other, thank you. Thank you for letting me try my best, and for trying with me, too.

They carry their fragility in studies, always stepping back to analyze what will be acceptable for tomorrow, and what must go today.

Building, of course, shared history.