yurious blast

"It was an accident. A slip of the tongue."

Miss Secretary giggles. "That's not what you were saying earlier...before, you denied even saying it at all." He holds up his comm, pretending to make a note of the change. "Veeerrry interesting..."

When Irina's already-disengaged eyes become as pursed as her lips, Miss Secretary amends, "Only teasing, dear. But it is interesting."

Lieutenant Irina Akulov, so stern-severe and duty-bound. So precise; so quick with her cannon, so smooth in her recovery. So unlikely ever to make a misstep, unless under the watchful eye of Colonel Elma or around the relentless soft-touch teasing of one Miss Secretary Spica.

(Is she perfect? Spica thinks she's perfect.)

She's certainly not the type to make an ad-hoc adjustment to the call of one of her Art names, and especially not one so frivolous as all this - even H.B. has a reason, of some unidentifiably unfounded sort, to be speaking of Superior Dives and Peerless Bombardiers.

Gwin shrugs, when Miss Secretary shoots him a questioning glance. "I already felt outnumbered enough by the girls on the team. If the Lieutenant wants to start shouting it out, who am I to complain?" Well. And who is he ever?

Alexa, in her own little world, has no comment on the matter. It's quite possible she didn't even notice what the rest of them heard happen. At this juncture, Miss Secretary decides that it will be up to him to gather further data from that very same Hector Birtwhistle and from one Sharon Effinger as well.

Murderess isn't always the most...forthcoming, on the occasions that Miss Secretary has questions for her, and he's a bit reluctant to pull the Irina Akulov trap card, but if he must, he will. For science!

H.B., of course, is easy - just butter him up by acting as if you're appealing to his unmatched intellect, only the likes of which could ever hope to satisfactorily answer your most burning of philosophical questions. No sooner said than done, with him. Well, maybe a little less sooner. But within an acceptable margin!

"It's quite simple, really," he'll say, and push up his glasses, which hadn't slipped. Maybe he's making a point to show the mole underneath his left eye? Or maybe it's a clever but subtle attention-getting technique, since most BLADEs usually zone out (not as bad as with Bozé, but still) when attempting to listen to his impromptu lectures.

Miss Secretary, of course, is an expert at tolerating the most intolerable of boring meetings, so he passes H.B.'s unspoken inspection with ease. The actual data gathered is as follows:

"Furious Blast? Well, yes, I've heard of it."

(Actually, what Miss Secretary had asked was "You're familiar with Furious Blast, yes?")

"It's an Art of tremendous utility, when utilized properly. Of course, if one simply casts it off as an opening attack, it's good for nothing."

And this is what Irina had done, indeed.

"In truth, it might be considered the cornerstone of the Assault Rifle kit. One can handle mobs, generate TP, finish off a Tyrant..."

Yeah, he's totally checked out of the yurisphere. Miss Secretary nods along and pretends once again to take notes.

Now on to Murderess. She's typically difficult to engage on topics of nonsense (and BLADE, contrary to what one might imagine, is rife with silly nonsense), but Miss Secretary knows how to spin this as a serious inquiry with a juicy reward waiting at the end of the rainbow.

"Good to see you well, Sharon," he begins brightly, making no particular show of the matter-of-fact fashion (of course! what else?) in which he uses her given name. "I was just thinking that you'd be the perfect choice for a new data-gathering venture we're conducting. Very limited scope and staff." Miss Secretary adds an emphatic nod to sell it a little harder.

"Yeah? I wouldn't say no to that," replies Murderess, angling herself a bit closer. "What's the premium?"

This is the tricky part. What Miss Secretary wants to do is tease, and tease, and tease, and make it so hush-hush that even the prospective payout isn't known, so great will be the returns! Not for the fun of torturing the Murderess, but for the art of the swindle, and never having to actually give up any credits.

Really, none of this is important in the slightest. But if Miss Secretary can find creative, office-appropriate ways to get closer to Irina, he'll execute on them, without a doubt.

Ah, well. "Since we're choosing operatives so carefully and personally, the exact reward is up to you! Take some time to think on what you'd like, and depending on the outcome of our research, we should have plenty of funding for whatever it is you can dream of."

This will probably put Murderess in the mind of home furnishings, retail or restaurant vouchers, AM discounts, et cetera - all things Miss Secretary is actually quite happy to help provide and/or procure, because it's more interesting than just a transfer of credits from one account to the other.

"Sounds too good to be true." Murderess smirks. "I'm in. Now, what's the ask?"

Miss Secretary smiles, sweet as can be. "Excellent. For this mission, we'll be asking you to report on the Soul Voices you most often experience and resonate with, as offered by other BLADEs." Maybe Murderess doesn't like paying attention to others, but she is darn perceptive when she wants to be.

He's about to send over the imaginary mission details when something - rather, someone - else catches Murderess's violet, now violent, eye.

"And you're sure this wouldn't have anything to do with Sister, here?"

Irina frowns. It's part resting face and part genuine reaction to Murderess's very presence. "Miss Secretary, what are you..."

"My job," answers Miss Secretary, firm in his conviction. "Is there a problem, Irina?"

"There shouldn't be." And there wouldn't be, if Irina hadn't been so adamant in her refusal. "I just don't often see you giving the Murderess special missions."

"Well, special is as special does," remarks Murderess. "I'm a woman who gets what she wants, and I'm not afraid to ask for it."

Now Irina grimaces, but only momentarily. "Unfortunately, I'm well aware. Miss Secretary, when you have a moment, I wanted to talk about earlier."

So maybe he feels a little guilty for baiting, such as it was, but still, what a victory! Miss Secretary nods his understanding, pink-cheeked.

"D'aww, isn't that sweet." Murderess looks between the two of them with thinly-masked derision. "Now, about my mission?"

"Oh, no." Miss Secretary's not even looking at his appointment anymore. "That won't be necessary."